Characters

MAJOR RON

Plays everything by the book. If you unzipped him, Captain Mainwaring from Dad’s Army would get out. Ronnie talks proper space talk, using words like ’Stellar parallax’, ‘Binary star’, and ‘Coriolis effect’.

Sample dialogue:
Ronnie: “Lieutenant Lola, set course for Planet Cumberland.”Lola: “Eye, eye Captain… is that left or right at the Northern Lights?”
Ronnie: “Lieutenant Lola, what’s the planet’s status?”Lola: “Our reading shows an oxygen-nitrogen atmosphere, sir, heavy with inert elements but well within safety limits.”Ronnie: “Are you reading from that ’Space Jargon For Beginners’book again?”Lola: “Errrmm…”

LIEUTENANT LOLA

Something of a liability when the proverbial hits the fan. In fact, she’s most likely to have caused the issue in the first place. The only space words Lola understands is ‘Autopilot’ which she seems to be on constantly. Ronnie is constantly having to get Lola back on track as she gets distracted by everything from shiny buttons on the command deck to bone-shaped constellations.

Sample dialogue:
Ronnie: “Phasers on stun, sweep the area.”Lola: “Sir, yes sir!” (Proceeds to actually sweep the area with a broom.) 
Ronnie: “Lieutenant Lola, fetch me the Captain’s Log.”Lola: “I thought you said you went before we got on board?”

TASER 

Another pug. Even madder than Lola. Rides around in a Space Uber driving aliens to various planets and space stations. Harbours desire to be an intrepid space explorer and helps out Ronnie & Lola when they get into trouble. Except that, as her name suggests, she is madder than a box of frogs and has a tendency to press wrong buttons and hurtle the trio into danger.

Sample dialogue:
Taser: “Leave this to me.”
Taser: “What does this button do again?”

FAT CAT

Evil Overlord of the Catosphere.
Sample dialogue:“Resistance is futile”

DOCTOR MCCOY

An actual coy carp doctor. Sardonic psychological mouthpiece and fixer-upper of wounded space creatures.

Sample dialogue with McCoy:McCoy: (referring to Taser who is doing mad-dog all over the ship) “It could be some sort of space madness we’ve never heard of…”Lola: “No, she’s just been eating that out of date Friskies dog food again…”

THE PREZ

High blood pressure, an addiction to sausages and a deeply misplaced perception that the pugs are the saviours of the sausage universe and have the slightest idea what they’re doing.

Sample dialogue:“Get me the pugs!”

U.S.S. WEINER

Pugs In Space can’t be pugs in space without their trusty sausage-sniffing space capsule.

Sample dialogue:“Where to, Guv?”

Meat-hook Milo & Steve from the Resistance meet Major Ron & Lieutenant Lola at The Thirsty Hound

THE RESISTANCE

The Resistance is an underground group of cosmic canines opposed to  Fat Cat’s evil empire.

Sample dialogue:“Anyone seen Steve?”